I have long list running in my head of things I want to share on this blog. I have all sorts of blog posts written in my head, but lately I’m finding they just are not getting written on the screen. And they’re starting to pile up. So rather than wait for the day when I have countless uninterrupted, prolific hours to myself I’m just going to start rattling them off. (I wrote this last Thursday night, and am just now posting it...)
1.
Worship. I went to Living Proof Live with Beth Moore when she was here in Minnesota a few weeks ago. It’s no secret that I love the teaching of Beth Moore, and her seminar did not disappoint. She spoke a bit about getting ready for a day when we as believers are outcast because of our faith. To be ready with obedient feet and merciful hands. To be confident in our identity, in community with other faithful believers and to remember when we are harassed it does not mean we are victims, because we are already victors. Her teaching stirred my heart and I sang and worshiped at the end with a freedom and abandon I have not felt in a long, long (super long) time.
2.
God’s voice vs. the voice of condemnation. My friend Lauren taught at our Women’s Bible study last week and talked about a simple practice that has made a huge difference for me this past week. I had a hard week with all sorts of voices of self-doubt and condemnation filling my head. Lauren said she’ll simply ask herself, “are these words that God would speak about me?” If they’re not, she dismisses them. I know this sounds so elementary. But all week long I have been taking some mean and self-critical thoughts captive right in the moment, reminding myself where my identity, strength and gifts really do come from. And moving on. Not dwelling.
3.
The power of Words. I been thinking a lot about the power of words and how we speak our reality into existence by the words we choose. This happens in how we share a story, what stories we choose to share, the words we choose to use to encourage or to nit-pick. And most of all, how we see another person. I had an experience this week where my feelings were just plain hurt. It was not intentional, but it still hurt. And on the way home I thought it my head, “That wasn’t intentional. I’m not going to give that moment the attention of a story.” And I didn’t. I didn’t tell Rory. I didn’t tell anyone. I went to bed. The world kept spinning, and days later I shared an awesome conversation with this friend and thought, “I’m so glad I didn’t make a stink about that other night.” People, I’m a slow learner sometimes. And this felt like such a huge leap in the right direction.
4.
My offensive game. Along the lines of the previous two points, I feel like I’m playing my offensive game better. I’m not purely responding to how others act around me or treat me. I’m playing offense, blocking little attacks that might otherwise get me down. My hurt feelings is the perfect example of this. I could have dwelled in a pity party for a while. And wasted those hours of my life. But I didn’t. And it felt like I was fighting back. To the devil who comes to steal my joy, kill my spirit and destroy my glorious mood I say: it’s not working.
5.
I have been praying for a personal revival, just an awakening of my faith in Jesus Christ. And I have had this prayer answered in lots of the ways mentioned above. I’m reading my Bible, praying, changed up my music and feeling grateful for this all-access pass to God’s goodness and all that he would have for me. I had a friend clarify that all personal revivals are for a collective revival. That you can’t really have a revival, party of one. Because God’s Spirit moves. And then she also pointed out that her greatest personal revivals were in seasons of deep despair. That in those valleys, her faith grew the most. And it made me wonder if all this stirring in my heart isn’t laying a foundation for a trial one day. Of course there’s no way to know. But it made me wonder. And then I thought some more and thought, well yes. No matter what my future holds I would want my foundation solid and my feet firmly planted. No matter what the days ahead look like I would want to be well studied and equipped with the truth. Trial or not, I want to soak up every moment of this eagerness to learn more of God.
6.
This morning I woke up at 5:30 to attend the National Day of Prayer breakfast in our town. It was awesome. First, to see so many (hundreds) of people from our community come together. Second, to have so many churches represented and gathered as one body. And third, because this year they had three pastors who had served in our town at some point over the past fifty years. They are older men now, and each was given the microphone for ten or fifteen minutes. And these men had fire in their bellies. They spoke as evangelists, coming to rally our gathered congregation. I left so inspired and grateful and glad to live here.
7.
On Sunday, Minnesota Teen Challenge was at our church sharing their stories of radical life transformation through the power of Jesus Christ. They shared for 45 minutes and I could have sat there all day long listening to one testimony after another. A few of the guys in the choir are from our area and spoke openly of the heroine problem we have in our town, and later shared that most of the kids are hooked by 7th grade. I had heard this before, but to have the actual kids, now clean for 11 months to share openly of the problem was sobering. Left me looking for ways to fight for those lives, before they spiral out of control.
8.
And in many ways, that is happening through our local Crisis Pregnancy Center, which has recently changed its name to The Women’s Center. Rory sits on the board, and we could not be more impressed with this center. Their concern is as great for the life of the mother, as it is for the life of the child. They have exceptional after-care programs to help get young moms back on their feet, to remember their own dreams for their future and to help them attain those dreams. They have just started a new program called Stepping Stones, and I have been asked to help lead the community walk that will happen this summer. I’m so excited about the program, so excited to help get the word out, and mostly excited about what a program of this magnitude could really mean for a sleep-deprived, financially-strapped, stressed-out mama. It is hope and help and, just like in Teen Challenge, lives are transformed.
9.
I’ve been wanting to write about this for about a year, so as long as I’m still typing, I’m going to give it a go. If you have lost faith in faithful living, I have got a book for you. It is fiction, but based on a true story. I keep it on the shelf by my bed and crack it open and read different seasons every so often. The book is called
City of Tranquil Light and it is about two missionaries and their term in China. The book came highly recommended from my sister-in-law Sara. It simply follows two faithful Christ followers who carry out their call with grace and love. I cannot recommend it enough. The book makes me want to run my own race harder, and I love books that motivate like that.
