Mara's 9th birthday!

My sweet niece, Mara, turned nine yesterday. We were so excited to go and celebrate her and all of the love and joy and kindness she brings to the world. We had a family party before her friend party, with ladybug cupcakes. And she got some awesome presents...including a kick ball and bases! I was so jealous!

This picture below of Ivar and Svea cracks me up...I believe those are what we would call, forced smiles...

Uncle Mark was able to be there, all the way from St. Louis. It was really special that he could come! Apologies to Svea, who was not invited in the picture below. :)

And then Mara's friends came. We played stone, stone (my personal fav), pin the antennae on the ladybug, walked to the dairy queen, opened presents and played kick ball. It was an awesome party.

The girls were so tired from all the walking they fell asleep at this bus station. :) Happy Birthday Mara! You are an easy girl to celebrate! We love you so much and love your humor, creativity, passion and determination. Thanks for inviting me to your party and for picking Dairy Queen to celebrate! My first DQ of the season!

happy places

I'm posting these pictures tonight because it's been a while since we've seen sunshine. Yesterday we had snow and last night it started sticking to the ground. These pictures are my protest. When the snow began to accumulate on the ground, I was starting to feel, shall we say, heavy laden. So in a moment of self-preservation I loaded up the kids and took them to the cupcake shop. It was 5:15pm. We hadn't had supper. Rory was gone for the night. And Ivar was protesting that he didn't want to go to the cupcake shop. But Mama did. Mama needed to go to her happy place.

Last year I started frequenting the cupcake shop in February as a way to cope with the weather. This winter I knew I couldn't start cupcake season that early. So this year I waited until March for my first official "winter-getaway" trips. Cupcake Season will conclude just as soon as I can wear flip flops again.

And when the sun is warm again, and lighting up the earth, we'll count this recent discovery as my new happy place. A friend of mine brought us here last week to throw rocks and sticks. I think we'll be spending lots and lots of time here this at this park this summer, swapping the cupcakes for the creek.

up to the flyest kite!

That's how Ivar sings those lyrics: "let's go fly a kite! up to the flyest kite!" And we did that on Friday night. It was effortless kite flying conditions, went up on the first attempt and we just kept letting out the string. It was so fun and high and awesome. And then it was time to bring it back in. Which was tedious and time consuming and took two adults taking turns to get the job done. But it was so worth it.

Ivar and his train talk

Ivar and I had dentist appointments today. It was Ivar's first dentist visit and he did awesome. His teeth look great and he found the whole experience to be quite the adventure. I was grateful for an awesome hygienist and the super cool sunglasses he got to wear so the light wouldn't shine too bright in his eyes.

On the way home we saw a police car with its lights flashing up ahead. Ivar said, "Mom! Let's ride the rails and go see that police!" His Thomas the Train world seems to be seeping into more and more of his every day life. More examples:

A few nights ago he was laying at the bottom of the stairs before bedtime. I asked him he thought he'd make it up or if he wanted me to carry him to bed. He replied, "I'll make it. I've got just a little bit of fuel to pump my pistons." Oh man. I hope pump my pistons sticks around for a while.

We were with friends, playing at a creek and Elsie walked in and got her shoes all wet. It meant we cut our playtime short and left our friends a little early. Ivar's friend Lily had a perplexed look on her face as we left. Later Ivar said, "Oh remember at the water when Lily was cross?"  Cross! That's a common word in the Thomas books, but so funny to hear Ivar use it in context.

And finally, everything around here is coupled. Ivar was using the velcro on the kitchen chair cushions and told me, "I'm just coupling the pillow back to the chair, Mom."

thegrovestead.com

Well, we have quite the big announcement. We have added another blog to the family.

This new blog is sort of an information sharing blog. Whereas joyfullybecca has more to do with family and stories and people, thegrovestead.com will be one part what we're learning and one part record keeping. Think of it as a public little log book, documenting dates, projects, and lessons learned from year to year. Sort of the blog we have been hoping to stumble upon during the last eighteen months.

I'm really excited about it. Mostly because now it is my husband who is saying, "can we start that movie in twenty minutes? I just want to finish up this blog post real quick..."

So check it out. Be sure to click on the black tab bar...it's pretty fun how he has his posts organized, covering all the little projects happening on our ten acres.

Feel free to pass the link along to anyone you think might be interested in joining our adventures. And if you want new blog posts sent right to your email, you can enter your email address on the right hand column of the site. Happy reading! Click here to get to thegrovestead.com

easter sunday

We got up on Sunday morning and went to our church to celebrate Resurrection Sunday. Then we came home and got ready for family. It was a glorious day in Minnesota and soon my parents, my sister and Svea and the entire Groves clan (except Maddie, who was at a wedding...a wedding! on easter sunday!) came to share a great big easter dinner.

In my head this prayer was going to be very moving...but my prayer was interrupted by a hungry rooster. That's what happens when you plan on your prayers being very moving. God calls in the rooster and keeps you humble.

We all fit in the sunny room at one long table. It felt very festive. And here's what is most amazing about my family. I made a creamed corn casserole. And that's it. Every single other part of the meal was brought by someone else. And, get this. My sister-in-law Lisa, made two hams on Saturday for our Easter meal. TWO. HAMS. She continues to out-do her out-done self. And everyone else brought two or three things too. It was a feast and felt completely stress free, because I have such awesome and amazing women in my family.

We had an egg hunt that spanned five acres of our property. It was so huge, and there were so many eggs that we didn't see a single cousin the whole time we looked for eggs! There is no competition when the eggs are so abundant and spread over so much yard.

The day concluded with tractor rides. Here is Svea taking her turn with Uncle Rory.

And then Troy wanted a turn too.

a hard worker

Friday night Rory evaporated our first 15 gallons of sap. Sunday afternoon he went for 20, and during the last five gallons it started sleeting on him. He came inside to watch the fire from the warmth of the living room and watched the syrup unexpectedly catch on fire and burn to char. I asked to take a picture, but he said he wasn't in the mood.

Last night he evaporated another 15 gallons, building the fire at 8:30. It was 12:30 when my sweet husband came to bed smelling like a lovely night of camping. We have rain and snow in the forecast, but sap has a shelf life and can go bad if you don't evaporate it within a certain window of time. We're down to the final fifteen gallons and I look forward to having maple syrup to put in my coffee again (so good...)

I decided to write this post though because of the conversation we just shared. It's 11:00. I am speaking for our women's bible study tomorrow morning and finishing up my talk. Rory is on the couch next to me mapping out a planting schedule and when each vegetable should go in the soil. And here's what's noteworthy: he's feeling frustrated because he's already behind. Which I think is endearing because he planted seeds five weeks ago. And there is snow forecasted for tomorrow. But he's frustrated because we should have had sweet potatoes sprouting in peat moss one month ago.

He's a hard worker, people. And fun to watch work.

april at the grovestead

+ The kids got to ride in the truck with us as we hauled a few loads of branches from the ditch out to the burn pile. Riding with no car seats through the field was pretty epic for them.

+ Ivar has become quite the helper lately. Here he was helping his dad remove the hay from the raised beds where Rory planted a lot of tulip bulbs last spring.

+ We had another great season for sap. We got 65 gallons this year, and have a garage full of five gallon buckets ready to turn into syrup. Rory is in full-on evaporator mode, already having boiled down his first fifteen gallons last night.

+ Thomas and Percy are adorable. Their little eyes always look sad, but I think that's just how kitten eyes look. They're tumbling out of their cat bed and beginning to walk around. They are so cute and make for a sweet way to welcome anyone who walks through our garage.

+ Our little seeds have been growing in mighty ways under the grow lights. We won't plant in egg cartons again...they seem to absorb so much of the water, it's hard to keep the little seeds properly watered. So we ordered a ton of plastic containers for the next round.

+ Our cats, Velma and Vernon are frisky as ever. We will have them both fixed at the end of the month so we don't turn into a cat farm. The way they tumble around the yard, I'm pretty sure we'd have another litter mid-summer!

+ Ivar has been very interested in the chickens lately. He brings them little dixie cups of cracked corn each morning and on this day threw them his yellow ball. He was a little sad that they didn't really play with it, or throw it back over the fence.

+ We had a picnic on Friday. Second of the season. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: parenting outdoors just feels like cheating. Lunch is lovely while eaten outside. I read a book while the kids played in the rock box. Elsie likes to sit in the baby swing, without being pushed. It was a stunning, quiet and warm morning.

don't not read this post because you've seen this book before!

I feel like I have to write fast. I feel like you're going to disregard this post from the start.You know the five love languages. You know your own love language. You know your husbands. You have read the book before. Besides, the five love languages are so 1990's.

But wait! Hear me out!

Rory brought this book along to Arizona and actually said, "hey, aren't you proud I brought a marriage book on our vacation?" And I was like, "yeah, thanks for that."

Because inside I was scoffing. I mean, who doesn't know the five love languages, and the seventeen spin off books by now? Rory and I took a class when we were first married so we know them well: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service and Physical Touch.

Rory was the one who read the book first on our vacation and then said, "you should just read the first three introductory chapters. They're short."

And people. This is good stuff. It's a bit surprising because the five love languages are so seemingly self explanatory. I mean, who can't figure out what "quality time" means. Except here's the thing: I read that chapter and had a zillion aha moments and realized that I had quality time all mixed up. I read this chapter and realized I am dying for quality time. But before reading the book I would have said I wanted "acts of service" because lately a surprise unloaded dishwasher can get me quite excited.

Anyway. Dig this book out. The content inside is really, really helpful and practical. If you have it on your shelf, dust it off and take a look again. Go to your library and check it out. It is immediately applicable, clarifying and led to some awesome conversations about our day to day marriage and how we want it to look and feel.

joy in the ordinary

The day after my birthday I was sitting in the sunny room while my kids napped. I watched the UPS truck pull up and I went to meet the driver in the garage and wouldn't you know, the package was for me. I opened it up and it was this book, given as a gift from my friend Shannon. Is there anything better than an unexpected gift in the mail?!!

The book is a memoir spanning three years before the author's firstborn goes off to college. She's in the midst of a midlife crisis, looking for her purpose apart from motherhood and making major life changes along the way. She is an eloquent writer, painting her life in brilliant detail, taking us all along for the ride.

A lot of the time while I read this book I had an ache in my heart remembering the truth of what so many older mothers love to remind us moms with little ones: it goes so fast.

So it was a perfect book to read poolside, child-free, while sun bathing and sipping a cherry coke. I read it and thought of the sweet pocket of time I find myself in these days. My kids are awesome, they are so fun. They are determined, hilarious and good company. And I am enjoying my gig as their mom so much. I feel content and grateful.

The book was great. A lovely read, and fun to walk the steps of her life during those huge years of transition. My worldview doesn't line up with hers. And I would have loved to have read of her journey from the perspective of a Christ-follower who believes in a God who makes all things new. But she is an incredible writer, thoughtful and attentive to her life in ways that open the reader's heart along the way.

It's a great book to help keep the long-view in mind. To not get so bogged down in the day to day. Often, my biggest lament to Rory when we crawl into bed is, "I have nothing to show for my day." And after reading this book, I'm not sure I ever will if I continue to measure against an outside immeasurable standard. But if I look a recent ordinary day: kids dressed and to the library, followed by an impulsive trip to the cupcake shop, home for lunch and naps, dishwasher unloaded and loaded, kitchen floor swept and living room floor picked up, a long walk outside with the kids, hamburger helper for supper, bedtime routine, snuggles and just as I walk out the door one last plea, "hey mom?" "yes?" "will you just come and snuggle with me?" "I just did that." "hey mom?" "yes?" "will you come and lay down next to me?"

If I look at this ordinary day, written out bit by bit, I can see a bit clearer. This book reminded me that even in this simple, mundane routine, I have a whole lot to show for my day. They're growing up right before my very eyes.

I read this book in the happiest of places, convinced that I would come home and live out my ordinary days with the unending joy they deserve. But in an ironic (and probably predictable) twist, the kids are really sticking it to me today. They're making sure I feel the pain of having just left them for four nights. They're both super needy, super crabby, super impatient. And the house is a post-vacation train wreck. I turned off Ivar's lamp at naptime and proceeded to step on a minion followed in the next step right onto a hard red parrot. Both feet! I limped out of his room biting my tongue with each hobble. I was so mad.

So there's that too. The gift of an ordinary day is truly a gift. This book helped me remember that, even in the midst of minions and red parrots.

arizona

Back in January, when Rory and I were in Orlando for our three nights of fun, I ended our trip with a bit of a meltdown. Which might be the mild way of saying that I cried hot tears through the evening fireworks show at Epcot. Not because they were beautiful or I was moved. But because I was angry and, in retrospect, exhausted and coming off of a serious sugar crash after eating my first Cronut. 

Anyway, it was one for the record books. We had a great day all day long, but the sun had gone down while we were in the Nemo ride. And suddenly the fact that we were flying home in the morning hit me like a ton of bricks. There was so much we were supposed to have accomplished on that trip. Lots of topics we had said, “we’ll talk through in Orlando.” But the two days came and went, we played hard and suddenly our trip was coming to a close and I panicked because I still had a laundry list of things I wanted to connect on.

Instead of rationally bringing this up to my husband, in my cronut-crazy state of mind I got all mopey and dumb and lame. And botched the whole evening.  I believe the high point of the melt down was when I cried, “we haven’t even talked about when we’re going to have our next baby!” And Rory replied exasperated, “This moment is not helping us get any closer to that happening…”

Which is sort of hilarious now. (And for the record, we're not planning any babies for a while here yet...) The meltdown was epic. One that will not-be-soon (actually, never be) forgotten.

And also for the record, the cronut is over-hyped. Either get a doughnut or a croissant. But don’t get both at the same time. It's too much. And you might end up loosing your mind on your husband when you come off all that sugar.

We overdid it at Disney. It was fun to play. It was fun to be kid free. It really was super fun. But it left us both wanting a vacation, after our vacation.

So we started planning another trip. We’re in a sweet pocket of time right now with little kids that are old enough to enjoy a few days with each set of grandparents. And we're taking great advantage of this fact. 

The plan for this trip was simple: lay low. No agenda. I told Rory when the airplane landed in Arizona that my personal goal was to be attune to my own napping schedule, no one else’s.

So we just spent four nights in Scottsdale. It was lovely and in the upper 80’s, lower 90’s each day. I read one and a half books, did not get a burn and enjoyed the good company of my husband.  We hiked one morning, met up with friends for dinner one night, and visited Rory's old youth pastor for church on Sunday morning. But other than that, we were poolside, drinking cherry cokes. And the books I read greatly shaped our conversation and our time together. I'll write about those next.

eieio elsie

eieio elsie from Becca Groves on Vimeo.

Elsie has a favorite song lately and I finally got a bit of it on video. She also really likes the B,I,B,I song...not quite the B,I,B,L,E, but we'll get there...

april fools

I woke up yesterday feeling the need to do something for April Fools day. And thanks to a quick google search found this funny trick: making "juice" out of jello.

Ivar helped me make the jello, put a straw in each jar and watched as I put the jello in the fridge. A few hours later, after nap time, he asked for his juice. And when he took his first big sip through his straw he was horrified, "Oh no! My juice won't come up!" Which means either this was an awesome April Fools joke or simply Jello 101 for my son.

Later the real April Fools joke came waddling into the living room in the form of a jello covered Elsie. Rory had given our one-year-old a jar of jello set on a chair to eat on her own and then went out to meet a guy to talk about apple trees on our property. April Fools Mom! Your daughter has fists full of powerful stain-making jello in her hands and you have half a second to get her and her slippery jello back into the kitchen.

Good joke, Ror!