mama wisdom day 5: annika

Annika is my big sister, and we talk every single day. Sometimes I wonder if her husband really likes me as much as he seems to...because at some point you must get sick of handing the phone off and saying, "it's your sister."

We shared a bedroom for part of our childhood, a longer room with two single box springs and mattresses on each side. I slept by the door and she slept on the far wall. And it seemed so far apart. For a while I had jump ropes tied together and tucked into our mattresses, telling her, "if I shake this rope, I need help" Honestly, I think there were 12 feet (edited...annika just called to say, "I really think it was only six feet...") between our beds. But it felt way too far for me.

Well, now she lives in Montana, and that is WAY TOO FAR FOR ME. I'd give anything to be two jump ropes away from her. We had a dreamy season two years ago when Rory and I lived at the same camp she and her family lived. We spent every day together, shared most meals and I felt like I was in some blissful tv show, where I could just drop in, or she and her girls would just drop by for surprise visits.

She's got two girls and a babe on the way. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Annika Larson.


1. How would you describe your mothering style?
My mothering style could be described as nurturing, interactive, and I hope my kids would say 'fun'!

2. What resources or who in your life was/is the most helpful in giving sound parenting advice?
Other mothers, but especially my mom. Although, mom is not one to give advice. Rather she encourages me in what I'm already doing and gives me confidence that way. If I have a question about a tricky situation with my kids, she will offer her feedback when asked for it. My peers who are mothers are also a great resource and I've appreciated sharing this wild role with other moms.

3. Was there a specific part of mothering that challenged you and your confidence in being a mom?
It can be challenging to be a first-time mom, especially those first few days, weeks and months. You really have to trust your mothering instincts and trust that you know your child best of all, because you do.

4. What is your favorite part of being a mama?
It is a joy to get to experience life through the eyes of a child and be reminded of my own child-like self. The things a two year old learns or something new that a four year old discovers for the first time is wonderful to behold. I am proud of Mara and Sonna and so grateful to have this amazing opportunity to raise them and do my best to help them be the loving, joy-filled little girls that they are.

5. Do you have a favorite story or quote from one of your kids?
What comes to mind today is hearing Sonna (almost 3) say, "Come on, sis!" or call out "Sister". I am so thankful that Mara and Sonna love each other so much and are good friends. That makes a mom's heart proud and grateful.

6. If you were to go back, and start your season of mothering all over again, what would you tell yourself?
One day when I was feeling quite unorganized and the house was a mess, Jedd's mom, Joan, said "I really wish I would have been okay with a messy house. Children are supposed to play and play is messy. I wish I would have let the house go and be okay with it more". That was good for me to hear. I used to have a clean house and be very organized and I've really had to let a lot of that go and be comfortable with it. Motherhood will change you like that. At the end of the day, I know my kids have had fun and been enriched by play-doh play, water coloring, board games, playing house, dress-up, or whatever. I also strive to help them learn how to clean up after themselves but as far as I can tell, this is more of a process than an event! Jedd's mom gave me a plaque that says: Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow . . . for babies grow up we've learned to our sorrow . . . so quiet down cobwebs . . . dust go to sleep . . . I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep. I keep it in the laundry room in our hallway. It's probably time I pass it on to Sara.

7. Anything else you would tell a first time, soon-to-be mom?
Accept any offers for help from people, especially things like meals, grocery shopping, house cleaning. It is a time that all mothers can relate to and women want to reach out and help nurture a new mom. And if you feel comfortable with other people holding your new baby, let them. There's nothing like holding new life and I think it makes for a well-adjusted baby to be passed around a bit. At least that's been our experience both in our church community and camp community.